What I have learned this past week.....
The alarm clock rings at just past six am, most mornings, almost all nights, I wake up several times before and turn the alarm getting out of bed before it goes off. For some reason I can't sleep. Not sure if its the amount of diet coke I consume during the day to keep me awake, or the stress of life running through my mind or a kid or two climbing in bed, kicking me, or possibly a combination of them all. All I know is I am not sleeping well and really don't even need an alarm clock, just wish for one night I could sleep until its annoying buzz beckons me out of bed.
I shower quickly, dress even faster, seeing I get to wear scrubs every day and only have two pairs to choose from. Its nice not having to decide what to wear, never realized before how much time I spent on this before, though its hard to wash laundry every day...just not a habit I have ever been good at. Off to work I go to log in before seven to start cleaning patients rooms. I never knew I had the energy or strength to work away from home and still be able to come home and take care of my family.
Never in a million years would I have even imagined me being a hospital housekeeper....I try not to see myself as "better than that" but sometimes it strikes a humble nerve to have to tell people that I am an education bachelor degree holder house keeper....Sometimes I enjoy telling people that I taught school, and watch the look of surprise come over their faces as they ask "why are you here?"
I enjoy being around people and enjoy hearing others stories as well as tell mine. I realize that I need to be in social settings and that I have grown a lot.
As I sat across the table today with a fellow house keeper and out of some kind of spite or immaturity or something she looks at me and says "Becky doesn't like you?"
"I do not think I even know her, why doesn't she like me?"
"Cuz your slow"
"I don't think I have even worked with her....not sure why she'd say that."
"Well I thinks its because she is upset that you have taken over her spot at work."
Seriously, are we in junior high people? Actually I don't think I ever did anything like that in junior high, but it sure has shown to me, and maybe I sound a little conceited but so proud of myself for not being one of those people that say things to other people to stir things up, or gossip or try to get a reaction out of them. I just got up and went back to work.
I am grateful that I have been taught to work with others and to be nice. I think people like me. And I am working well with them and they are liking me.
And to top it all off, I have learned that even though I am experiencing trials that I never imagined, they really aren't more than I can endure. And as much as I would like my life to change, the things around me to change, the only thing I can to do is change the way I see them and my own thoughts and attitudes about the whole thing. So today, I proudly say, I am working as a housekeeper to help support my family. It is not my number one choice of a job, but its a job. It doesn't pay half our bills but it pays some of them. I am grateful for work right now.And most days I enjoy getting up and meeting new people. And in the end, I will look back and see how much this time has helped me to grow and become the better person I will be.
And tomorrow when I am another year older, I can proudly hold my head up and know I am doing the best that I can do to endure and ENJOY the life I have been given.