Why can't I sleep?

It's 4 AM and I really should be asleep but I just can't!  I wish it was because I was all excited for Santa to come, or we were getting ready to go on a long vacation to Hawaii.......but it's not.....more like I had to go to the bathroom after being kicked in the gut by Two.   And for some reason I have this nagging something's not right, something is bad happened, sick gut feeling....could be the kick but after going to the bathroom the feeling hasn't left me.


My mind wanders over the thoughts of how life sure has taken me on a ride this past year....a very long topsy tervy (sp?) one.   Today I felt overwhelmed with all that is going on, and am feeling the weight of our situation on my shoulders.  Maybe that is what is wrong with my right arm, it is numb most of the time and can't hardly move my shoulder, here I was thinking I pulled my muscle or hurt my shoulder disk (if you have one?) but maybe its just the stress of my life.

I have decided that finding the job as a housekeeper has been a great one for me, all but the paycheck, but any little bit helps...though its hard to go to the store and get your kids needed glasses because they already broke and had their one fix for the next 24 months, and think oh I just have to work two full eigh hour shifts to pay those off....and then have your son come home from school with both his feet sticking out of the front of his shoes and buy him a pair and think wow now I have to work five hours to pay those off....and we didn't buy expensive shoes! 

Anyway I enjoy the physical part of housekeeping, running from room to room, cleaning quickly...though I have found I am a little OCD and its hard to turn around a room in the time limit.  Though I was so proud of myself the other day, I only mopped the room once....But the other great part of my job is the opportunity to meet so many people, because man that hospital has a lot of people passing by.

The hardest part of going from a fulltime mom, to a fulltime employee and mom, is I ....well just lost my train of thought....but I find that I need to sleep!

Night!