I can only see 4 of your eyes....

Today my Bee and G-Man had some major dental work. Unfortunately they had so much, and our insurance was running out this month, that we decided to go for sedation, that way it could all get done in one fail swoop. I have to say if you are in the Davis, Weber county, Dr. Brad Dawson of Kidz Dental is awesome!  Anyway, Bee went first because she had more to be done, and I figured G-Man wouldn't mind playing play station on an empty stomach.  She did great. She woke up incredibly fast, and other than repetitively asking about what was wrong with her tooth (it had been capped) and an occasionally bugging out and rolling of her eyes, there wasn't anything too funny about her awakening.  

However, my little G-man had me in tears from laughter.  As you can see here, he is wiped out. He'd be like this and then his little head would pop up, his eyes, like those of a deer caught in head lights, and his arm would raise in a hail Hitler, a smiled crossed his face, and in his most slurred and happy voice he said "Hi mom!"  Then he would crash back into this pose. Then his dad walked in, and he did the same thing but then said "hi dad."  Crash.  Well one point after saying hi to me, he looked at me all bugged eyed and said "mom I can only see four of your eyes!"  He was shocked and saddened.  I just wonder how many eyes he normally sees on me.  He went on to count all my noses and then crashed.  Then popped up "hi mom!"  It was so sweet. It was the sweet little voice, of his really early years.  Of all my kids he was always the most excited to see me in the morning, and always greeted me with a "good morning mom, so happy to see you."  Times have changed a little but it was so sweet to hear it.

Well after we came home, we actually spent some quality time as a family.  Eric flew in for the weekend, and was suppose to leave at 11 this morning, but with both kids out, he changed his flight til tomorrow.  The kids sat on Eric's lap and watched videos of g-man after surgery.  And then Eric lay on the floor playing airplane with the kids, and G-Man looked at me and said "I wish it could be like this everyday in our family." 

"what the house a mess?" because I was looking around at the huge mess, that was mostly created by our little Texan Tornado T-Rex.

"house a mess, who cares, no all of us sitting together talking and laughing and just having fun."

I do too.  It saddens me that Eric will be gone now for over 50 days. He was only gone some 20 something days, and it felt like forever.  Makes me wish we had chosen to go with him in the first place, however, things are going well here. Kids are loving school, and have great friends. I have work and am enjoying that.  And soon enough we will all be together, hopefully having more fun moments like tonight.

12 Eyes...and Jam

Bee has been struggling with reading for awhile.  She mostly read by seeing the first letter and just guessing a word that begins with that letter.  Then sometime in the last few weeks, she decided to put on Two's glasses to read.  And amazingly she began reading better.  So I decided, maybe it was time to have her vision checked.  Believe you me, I felt like a horrible mother when after we left the eye doctor with a prescription that he knocked down a few levels so she wouldn't be legally blind....well not quite, being a little dramatic, but he did make a lesser prescription.  Just crazy to think 3 out of my 4 are farsighted....Where did they get their eyes?

But the best part of the exam that just made me smile, maybe a proud mom moment, or a proud teacher moment but the nurse put the letters up on the wall and said, "tell me what the letters say."

Bee looks eyes all strained...and says "buh, duh, kuh, tuh, mah."  I just smiled, because she told her what they say.

She is so excited to get her glasses, and I am so excited to have her be able to see. 

Just makes me wonder, if you know Bee, you know her stare, if she really was staring, or if she was just trying to focus and see you....just a thought.

The kids and I picked our pears. 19 gallons of pears!

This last weekend I made, with the help of my mom, some pear jam.  She gave me some plum, peach, peach-raspberry jams that she had made.  Still carrying a load of pears, that the kids made, I decided to make some more jam/sauce yesterday.  So I whipped up a couple batches of strawberry-pear sauce/jam.   When G came in last night as I was making it, he commented on how it smelled so good, that we needed to make waffles or pancakes or crepes.  I agreed it sure smelled good.

So this morning I woke up to the kids making pancakes.  They had all kinds of shapes going. Then they opened up a jar of all the jams we have, including the cherry syrup our neighbors gave to us yesterday after we dropped off some pear jam.  They poured the jams into their own bowls and began taste testing.  Their first favorite was my moms peach raspberry then my pear-berry.  It was really cute!  Such cute kids.

And I am going to work on pear raspberry tomorrow, or maybe Thursday....or Saturday??? I don't know but I still have a ton of pears, and still many growing on the tree.  But am so excited that I canned by myself and it wasn't as hard as I thought...though i just finished cleaning up the kitchen from my mess...but that is more out of shear laziness. 

Pears anyone?

And Eric is coming home for three days this weekend, got a sitter for Friday night!!!!  and ......older two are having oral surgery on Monday...I guess not really oral surgery but sedated dental work, lots and lots needs to be done, and we are going to do it all in one shot. Glad Eric will be here for it.

520....really

this will be my 520th post! wowsers...I was just thinking that I should post some pictures....and then noticed 520 and thought wow pretty cool....anyway I never really posted many pictures from this summer...it sure was a busy one.  So here you go...a heck of a lot of summer photos...

Sand Castles

Do you remember as a child, spending hours at the beach digging in the sand?  Sometimes just digging a hole, to just dig, maybe thinking you could reach China?  Or building a sand castle by the waters' edge to have a wave come crash it down?  Or digging a mote, around the castle, that leads to the water, and running back and forth trying to fill it fast enough that for just a moment the water stood still and the mote was filled? 

Do you ever feel that life is like building sand castles?  It seems that way to me lately.  Spending hours on end cleaning, or working, or teaching or disciplining children, paying one bill after another sometimes not seeing an end insight.  Though sometimes not just as fun is it? I guess it can be though. It all depends on how you see it.  As an opportunity to try again, or an opportunity to cry and say why me and go running away. 

Sometimes it seems that like the waves coming in hard, and basically wiping the slate clean and flat, life gives us opportunities to get up and try again.  Maybe something totally different.  Its at those moments when you got to choose your attitude and what you are going to do with it. 

I'd like to say I'm the one that always sees it as an opportunity to try again, but sometimes I do sit and pout and wonder why me....but not too much.  I truly believe things happen for a reason. And love being able to look back and think, well that really was a tiny castle, or not a very deep hole, this time its going to be bigger and better. 

Its funny though no matter what your attitude is,  it seems that sometimes in life there are people like the waves, that just like to creep up and smash your hard work and tear down your castles.  And like the waves they really are unaware of what they are doing, rather they are just doing what they always do, coming in and going out.  Totally set in their own motion.  Truly unaware that they possibly could be making the wreckage on the shore. 

So I guess the best thing to do sometimes, is to pick up your toys, and go further up the beach, out of the reach of the waves.  Grab a bucket, run to the water, fill it and bring it back to the dry sand, and start building over.  Its just safer that way. 

Come November we will have a clean slate again, and though I am not sure what lies ahead, I know that this next little hole and sand castle is going to be an adventure and we survived the last (with out too much sand in our eyes.) Though every once in awhile a little wind gust will blow some sand from the previous castle, stinging a little....but you move on because you have a sand castle to build or a really big hole to dig! And you just don't have time to worry about the wave coming to get you.  

Happy sand digging!

The Night She Said Good-Bye

This morning I awoke abruptly to the sweet tender voice of my grandmother, whispering in my ear, telling me that everything was going to be okay and that everything was going to work out.  Its been three years since I have heard her actual words, and unsure why this morning I felt her so near, and miss her so much. 

I have a precious relationship with my grandmother.  I 'd say out of her 16 grandchildren, I most likely was her favorite, or at least she made me feel that way.  Though I am pretty sure she didn't have a favorite.  I just like to pretend I was hers.  Though unlike many of my cousins or the friends I grew up with I had the rare opportunity to live near her, attend church with her and visit weekly with her while growing up.  Definitely a special relationship developed between us as we spent time together.   I try to block out the memories of "sleeping" in her front room, sun still blazing, neighbor kids playing at 7:00 in the summer, as I lay watching from the window. 

While in college I'd go and visit with her on the weekends, and shop in her pantry.  We'd sit and hang out, and Grand-Dad would fill me in on how my high school team was doing in football. 

Over the years, as I lived in Texas I spoke on the phone with her several times a week, mostly just to say hi. 

Then that Friday morning, when my mom phoned to tell me I needed to fly to Utah because she most likely wasn't going to make it through the weekend.  I quickly called Eric and he made arrangements for my flight that afternoon. Several of my friends chipped in and took the kids for me, so I could fly out immediately.  

When I arrived I stayed the evening with my little sister Alyson.  Then the next morning I went over to my parent's house to hang out with everyone.  The amazing thing, my grandmother while on her last breaths, literally she had pneumonia and a hole in her lungs, couldn't stop asking me questions. I rubbed her feet as she continued to ask about the kids, and Eric and work and life.  At that point we were trying to sell our house and figure out what we were doing with Hawaii and the family and Eric's work.  She and I just talked.  There were other people there visiting and coming in and out, but I just hung with my Grandmother. 

As I was preparing to leave, I went over and hugged my grandmother, gave her a kiss.  I whispered in her ear that I loved her.  I wanted so very much to say to her "I will see you tomorrow." But was over whelmed by the spirit, that this was my last moment with her, and to tell her "I love you, and want you to know that you have lived an amazing life, we will all miss you, but it really is ok for you to leave this body that is causing you so much pain. I love you."  She told me she loved me too.  And with a heavy heart and tears I left the room. 

As I went to sleep that night, I prayed that we would all be comforted, and I fell asleep.  In the early hours of the morning, I dreamt my grandmother was standing in her long pale blue sheer nightgown, next to my bed, rubbing my cheek with her soft pale hands.  She bent down and whispered in my ear "I love you Corrine, and want you to know everything is going to work out.  I will make sure of it."  She kissed me on the cheek and was gone.  Not but a few seconds later my sister came to the door, I sat up and said "I know." 

For the longest time I could feel her watching over me.  I could see her hands in things I did.  Every once in a while I'd get a whiff of her perfume.  And as the ache of losing her faded so did the feeling of her closeness. 

And I have to say the last year and half have been emotionally, physically, financially, spiritually trying on me. And maybe it is coincidence that last night I felt her near me, maybe its a reminder that she is still watching out for me.  Or maybe she has been busy and now has realized how much I need her help and is back watching me more closely...or just giving me that little bit of encouragement I have been needing.  Whatever it is or was, I am grateful for her and my relationship.  And the faith that she has in me to help me succeed. 

Life reaches further than the grave.  Bodies are buried but spirits live on.  I know this.  I am grateful to know that I have some people on my team.  And am even more grateful to have had the experience of knowing my Grandmother the way I did.  And knowing that one day again, I will see her.